What does love look like?

 So this is an old note I wrote on Facebook last year and just wanted to repost it. :)

So I have been struggling a lot lately on what it means when someone says "I love you." Is it really possible for them to tell you they love you one day and then a few days later tell you they don't "feel" like they love you anymore? Is that really the kind of love that God talks about in the Bible? No. I don't think Jesus decided to die on the cross for our sins because He just so happened to be in love with His people that day. You think Jesus really "felt" the love when he was getting beaten by the people that He came to the world to save? I seriously doubt it. And yet He still laid down His life for me just so that I can have eternal life in Heaven! " When Jesus saw us hopelessly enslaved to sin, he didn’t say, ‘I don’t feel like dying on a cross for them. I think I’ll wait until the feeling comes."That is true love. So....the questions still remain:Is real love based on feelings? and Is it real love when one day someone says "I love you" and the next they cant? My conclusion...NO!

In our culture today, love is all about feelings of mushy gooshy happiness with rainbows and bunnies and unicorns prancing around a field filled with colorful sunflowers. "I love you because of how you make me feel when I'm with you." "I love you because of all the things you have done for me." "I love you because of your personality." So what if one day the person that you love does something to hurt you or doesnt make you feel so great? Does that mean that you dont love them anymore because you dont have feelings anymore? To the world....yes but to God...no. I think many of us as Christians are getting sucked into the worlds tainted definition of love. We are often confusing having feelings of lust towards someone to feelings of love. Lust is selfish. Lust is directed towards ourselves. Lust is about getting and not about giving. God calls us to "Love each other as I have loved you." (John 15:12) 1 John says "This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another" God showed us His love by sending His only son to die on a cross and He definitely didn't do it because we are so awesome and deserve it. Romans 6:23 says "For the wages of sins is death..." Am I a sinner? Yes. Then do I deserve to go to heaven and have eternal life? No. But look at the second part of that verse "...but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Because of God's unfailing love, I can go to heaven! So going back to the first question: "Is true love based on feelings?" ummm....obviously not. "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8) It doesnt say "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were so awesome and made Him feel so great He decided to love us." Nope...we are a sinful world that NEVER shows God that love that He deserves and yet....He STILL loves us. :) Actually I'm really grateful God's love for me is not based on feelings and what I do for Him because well....it probably wouldn't turn out so well.....

Now on to the next question.."Does true biblical love fade?" Read Psalm 136 and try and tell me that true love fades. Yes, feelings fade, emotions go away but the love that is talked about in the bible will NEVER go away. When God says "I love you" today, it means just as much when he says it tomorrow and the next day and 5000000 billion years from now. And are we not as Christians supposed to love as Christ loved us? "A new command I give to you: Love one another. As I have loved you, love one another." (John 13:34) So how is it possible for a Christian to say they truly love someone and then one day for that love to fade? Well sadly due to our own sinful nature we tend to forget the love that God has called us to have towards other people. We think since the feelings go away, we no longer love someone. I once read "There is no solution given for what to do when the emotion fails you and the warm fuzzies are gone-other than bailing out and starting over with someone else." But like I said, love isnt about feelings, its about commitment. 1 Corinthians 13 says "Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love NEVER fails."  So is it true love when someone can say "I love you" one day and not love you the next? NO.

One of my new favorite songs is called "Arms Wide Open" by Misty Edwards. It is probably the best depiction of God's love. The lyrics are insane. :) 

URGENT NEWS!!! GOD'S PLANS ARE GREATER!

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9.

Plans for my life

I want to go to college in North Carolina.

I want to have a boyfriend while in school. 

  I want to graduate in 4 years with my bachelors degree.

 I want to get married right out of college. 

I want to have a good paying job.

 I want to be financially stable.

 I want to have a house with a white picket fence. 

I want to be settled down with my family.

I want to live the American Dream.

As many of you know, this past summer I went to Africa with an organization called Adventures in Missions. The summer trip was with the section of the organization that is geared towards college students between the ages of 18-22. If you have read any of my previous posts, you know that that summer completely changed my life....literally. I won't go into everything that God has done in my life the past year because that would take an entire book but one of the biggest changes He has made in my life is my desire for overseas mission work. I know that not everyone is called to it but since January I have felt that it is something that I want to do in my life and this past summer was kind of a test to see if it was something I really would enjoy doing.  Ever since my trip to Africa, I have felt God calling me to do more and recently He has given me an amazing opportunity to do just that with Adventures in Missions.....it's called the World Race. July 2012 to June 2013. 11 Countries. 11 Months. Serving 1 God.

Plans for my life vs. God's Plans

I want to go to college in North Carolina.

I am at Mercer University in Georgia.
 I want to have a boyfriend while in school. 

Okay, so I did have a boyfriend but we all know that ended. Currently single. 

  I want to graduate in 4 years with my bachelors degree.

 I will graduate in 5 years.
 I want to get married right out of college. 

Jury is still out on this one but at this point I don't think that is what God has planned.

I want to have a good paying job.

I won't get paid any money for an entire year.

I want to be financially stable.
I will be living on the support of others.

I want to have a house with a white picket fence. 
A tent will be my house.

I want to be settled down with my family.

I will be moving from country to country for 11 months with my new "family." 

I want to live the American Dream. 

I am won't even be in America.

I know this may seem crazy. For some people, me taking off my last year of school to go travel the world and do mission work seems stupid. I want everyone to know that this is a decision that I have been praying about for a long time and God has never been more clear in his answer. He wants me to go. He is calling me and I have answered yes. I am choosing to step out in faith, knowing that this decision does not seem logical and I am asking for your support. Whether it be in prayer or financially, I am going to need support in this. Being gone for two months this summer was a big deal for me and realizing that I am going to be gone for 11 months is even scarier.

Disclaimer: God could choose to change my path again before I leave next July. I will need to raise $15,500 for this trip which seems like a lot but I believe that if this is something He wants me to do, He will provide the money. Therefore, for those of you thinking that I should wait until after I graduate, that still may happen. If God does not provide the funds then I will wait. As of right now, I am just jumping into this believing that this is what God is wanting from me. If it is not, then I believe He will show me. Also, I will be returning to school to finish my senior year August 2013. I am not dropping out of school, just deferring a year. Trust me. I would not do 3 years of engineering school just to drop out. My plan is to finish off my senior year when I get back and then to go to medical school. My long term goal would be to open up a clinic in a third world country and be a long term missionary/doctor. I know that is a huge dream but I like to dream big. :)

COUNTRIES: Ireland, Russia, Ukraine, Nepal, Cambodia, Tanzania, Kenya, Mozambique, India, Malaysia, Challenge: Asia

FINANCIAL INFORMATION: So as I said before, the total cost of this trip is $15,500. I will be starting actual fundraising in the VERY near future and more information on how I will be doing that will be coming soon. However, if you do feel led to donate you can do so online at: https://www.adventures.org/give/donate.asp?giveto=worldrace&desc=For%20Brittany%20Morrison 

If you would like more information regarding my trip you can contact me or go to http://www.theworldrace.org/?tab=routes&subtab=july-2012-3

Also, to keep updated on fundraising and other information you can "like" my facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Brittany-Morrisons-Mission-Fund/118091738290575 

  

"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'" Isaiah 6:8

My Story....Part 3

Welcome back! I am glad that you have come back to read the BEST part of the story. :) So like I said, I was a mess and feeling pretty crappy. Well, one morning during team worship, the leader, Angie, began to talk about how when she was on the World Race, she one day made a decision to choose into freedom. She literally drew a line in the sand, "took off" her old self and said aloud “I am new! I am free!” I really believe the Holy Spirit was speaking through her that morning. In that moment, the wind began to blow (which does signify something to me and call me or come find me if you wanna hear the story, it’s a pretty cool one). Anyways, so the wind began blowing and I heard God say to me, “Step forward. Step out of your past. Be bold. Choose into me and choose intro freedom. Do now wait anymore.” So I did. I literally stepped forward and said out loud, “I am done with my past! I am done with who I used to be and I am set free! I believe I am beautiful! I believe I am worth being fought for! I believe I am a child of God and I deserve to be treated like one! My significance is no longer found in man but in God alone! I will not go back! I am no longer ashamed of my past and it no longer will dictate my future! “ I was seriously standing there in the middle of the circle, crying and screaming out these declarations. That moment God changed my life. I am forever changed and I will never go back. After I made that choice to step into the future that God had for me, Angie asked me to pray in that moment and ask the Holy Spirit to give me a vision that I could always remember when I began to falter. I immediately received an image of me, looking back and I saw my old self standing there. The old me was depressed and dark. With me holding my hand was my ex and behind us was darkness and emptiness and all the lies that I ever believed. Suddenly a giant metal fence appeared with no door, no end, and no way to get over. Then I turned around and looked down at myself. I was clothed in white linen and glowing with light. I was smiling and the wind began to blow through my hair (once again very significant) and in front of me was a field full of grass and beautiful flowers and birds. There was just so much life. It was as if God was saying, “I will never let you go back. From now on you are going to be filled with joy and life. You are free my child!” I will never forget that moment and I remind myself of that image every morning I wake up. I AM SET FREE! I continue to write that in bold because it is such a huge deal for me. I have no idea who I am writing this for. You may be my best friend or you may be some random person I just met. But let me just emphasize how important this moment was for me. If you know me well then you can probably understand. This moment of choosing into freedom and choosing into God’s love literally changed my deepest core. It completely changed my outlook on my life, on my faith, on the people from my past, the people in my present and what I want for my future. Honestly, it’s not something that can really be explained in this blog. That change can only be experienced through seeing my life now and how this experience impacts the way I live it. This means if you are my best friend, yay because you get to share in my experience. Honestly, sitting here remembering that moment and trying to write about it is a little overwhelming. I mean how do you really write on paper an experience like that and get someone to really understand it? How can you describe something so indescribable? I almost want to tell you just to call me up so I can talk to you about it because that seems to be easier for me to do. So if you want to talk to me, I would love to share. Not only about that particular moment but others as well. I can’t begin to write all that God did in this blog but I do hope that I can continue to share with you other things because it is worth sharing. I mean its about God so how can it not be right? 

So basically after that moment, the entire trip changed for me. Instead of having my mind constantly on my ex and home, it was on God and His wonder and love. I was constantly in prayer and constantly in worship. At one point in Nairobi, I was so overwhelmed with joy from the Spirit that I literally had to stop listening to my worship music when the team was at a coffee shop. If I didn’t I would have just busted out in some crazy worship right there. Ever since that morning in Kenya, I can’t stop smiling. I am so happy, so full of life and so ready to minister to those around me. I want to serve. I want to help others receive the same freedom that I have received. I want people to be so in love with Jesus that they don’t need anyone else. I want to challenge people to listen to the Holy Spirit. I want to speak life into people. I want to continue to be used by God and bring His kingdom to earth. Yes, I still have struggles and I am easily tempted by the devil but I know that God will continue to lead me. I believe the same for you. The same God that loves me and gave me freedom loves you as well. He loves you and wants the best for you. I once again want to ask you that you STOP and PRAY. Pray that God pour His spirit onto you. Pray that he show His love. Pray that He speak to you. Whatever He says, write it down. Ask Him to teach you what it means to follow Him and what it means to be filled with the Holy Spirit. Ask Him what He wants you to hear from Him, not what you want to hear. LISTEN. BE SILENT. Just listen for His voice. I pray that God begin to speak to you. I pray that He begin to teach you and refine you. I pray for growth.

"Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14

My Story....Part 2

Well, I hope you took what I said before to heart. Okay, so where was I? Oh yeah. Kenya. Okay so by the third night in Kenya I was all screwed up and I literally broke down. I just sat down on a rock and started crying and when I say crying, I mean balling my eyes out. I didn’t know why I was in Africa. I had no idea where God was or who I was. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do with my life and I could feel myself crumbling. I felt as if everyone around me was overwhelmed by joy and by the Spirit and I was sitting there alone and unbelievably broken. I had been in Africa for 3 weeks and still had not gotten any healing or freedom. I ended up talking/crying to my leader and she began to tell me that I was right where I needed to be. It was in that place of brokenness that God was going to begin to put me back together. She told me that it was going to be hard and that it is in this place that I am going to have to deal with things about myself that I had been pushing aside. Man was that true! I began to face up to my past and God really began to work. I had to deal with the shame of crossing physical boundaries with my ex and regret I had in putting him as an idol in my life. I had to deal with my need to control that situation and other things in my life. I had to deal with my self-confidence issues. I had to deal with the fact that I felt like I was too much and not enough at the same time. I had to face up to the fact that I thought I was a failure. I had to learn what it meant to love and be loved by those around me. It was a really hard experience but before I could really be set free, I had to unlock the cage to my past and face up to it. I’m so glad I did! So once again, I ask that you STOP and PRAY. Is there anything that you need to face up to? Are there any lies that have imprisoned you that you need to face up to? Ask God to bring you to a place that you can recognize them. Before you can begin to replace them with truth, you have to know what the lies are so you can place them at the feet of the cross. So before you move on, pray about that. I promise it will be good.

So at this point in my story, I am a broken mess but so ready for growth and freedom. Also at this point in the trip, the team was in the bush with the Masaai tribe where we were going to spend 10 days with no showers, sleeping in tents and literally killing our own goat just so we could eat.  Let me tell you, this was definitely an experience. By the end, I had so much dirt caked on my skin that when I finally did take a shower, I lost a few shades of skin color and I was still wiping off dirt for the next few weeks. But I would still give anything to go back there. Okay, so we are about to get to the best part of the story. Get excited. I mean God is about to do something incredible in the story so how can you not be excited? Well at least I am excited…I pray that you get excited too because this is ridiculously awesome....but of course like all good t.v. shows, I'm going to stop for a commercial break at the best part. This means you have to come back next week if you want to read the happy ending!